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Tag Archives: STAND-UP GOLD

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A 23-year-old German woman wants to marry a toy Boeing 737. She previously dated a real 737, but it was carrying too much baggage. Read More

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House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s husband, Paul Pelosi, was arrested in Napa, California, for DUI. This is inexcusable. Sure, being married to Nancy is an excuse to drink, but it’s no excuse for drinking and driving. Read More

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Amber Heard’s lawyer exhibited a 2016 text-message in which Johnny Depp called the actress a “50-cent stripper.” Not to defend Johnny, but back then, 50 cents was worth a lot more than it is today. Read More

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“Benny the Jokeman is unique in his ability to create consistently hilarious material in great volume every day. I call him ‘Benny the Joke Machine.” Jay Leno Read More

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In Afghanistan, the Taliban has ordered female news-anchors to cover their faces. Unfortunately, ABC refuses to implement this policy at “The View.” Read More

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In Afghanistan, the Taliban has ordered female news-anchors to cover their faces. Unfortunately, ABC refuses to implement this policy at “The View.” Read More

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The world’s donkey population is threatened by Chinese drugmakers, who use donkey skin to make medicine. The good news is, it’s no skin off my ass. Read More

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Did you see the UFO hearing? Congress is finally taking UFOs seriously. The bad news is, the fools are still ignoring Bigfoot. Read More

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Today is World Migratory Bird Day. According to a new study, birds are coping with global warming by changing their migratory flight-paths. Apparently, their new route is directly over my windshield. Read More

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Happy Birthday to former “James Bond” actor Pierce Brosnan. I don’t want to say he’s getting old, but these days his signature drink is a Metamucil, shaken, not stirred. Read More

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